one

[whipcracks.livejournal.com]

[ a young woman's voice comes on the Vine. she does not sound pleased. in fact, 'furious' might be a more appropriate way to describe it. ]

What is the meaning of this?! I demand an explanation! Right now! [ there is a loud, sharp CRACK!, the sound of leather hitting hard against the ground. ]

Any foolish answers will be met with a whipping! I don't want to waste my time hearing nonsense explanations!

[ she ends this with another CRACK!, to emphasize her point. ]

Comments

[gravityfists.livejournal.com]

[ ]

Ma'am, I'm sure everyone here would be a billion times more willing to help out if you didn't start off with threats. All misdirected anger can and will be rerouted to Her Royal Looniness.

[whipcracks.livejournal.com]

If by "Her Royal Looniness" you're referring to that Queen of Hearts woman, then I assure you that the moment we meet, she will have judgment rained upon her person in the form of my whip.

[gravityfists.livejournal.com]

You'll have to get in line. And possibly pull one of those tickets off the reel that tells you when your turn's coming up. Y'know, [] Now serving: number sixty-seven. Number sixty-seven, please report to the killing floor.

Er—but as for meaning, you've pretty much been kidnapped. To an alternate universe. Full of women.

[thewisechoice.livejournal.com]

Too bad...

[ this voice is pretty nonchalant ]

There only are nonsense explanations.

[whipcracks.livejournal.com]

Spare me the foolish words of an ignorant fool who is too much of a foolish fool to correct their own foolish ignorance! There is a logical explanation to everything! The fact you're not aware of it doesn't make it nonexistent!

[thetrueblow.livejournal.com]

You can't whip people through the vine.

[whipcracks.livejournal.com]

Of course, I'm no fool. I didn't expect to be able to, as convenient as it may be. It's simply my way of giving people warning, while keeping count for when I meet them face to face.

[burns-things.livejournal.com]

Oh, I think I like you.

[whipcracks.livejournal.com]

While I am quite likable, I have no need for compliments right now. I don't suppose you have a more rational explanation to give me than the fools preceding you?

[contemptuous.livejournal.com]

[There's just...an amused laugh.]

There are no explanations that would appease you.

[whipcracks.livejournal.com]

I've already been told that by several other foolish fools, and hearing it the first time was more than enough. I don't require further unnecessary repetition! [ CRACK! ]

[yakuza-otaku.livejournal.com]

... if enough people are telling you the same thing, wouldn't that be almost as good as having decisive evidence?

[whipcracks.livejournal.com]

... !

[whipcracks.livejournal.com]

For something as absurd as this, no, that's not nearly good enough! If a hundred people told you unicorns were real, would you believe them? Of course you wouldn't! Because it clearly defies any and all logic! That much should be obvious!

[ultimatedessert.livejournal.com]

The most LOGICAL explanation is that you've been given a very powerful hallucinogenic, and this entire affair, my loveliness included, is an extension of your twisted and disturbed imagination.

[whipcracks.livejournal.com]

[ ... damn it, that's actually true-- ]

[whipcracks.livejournal.com]

Silence! [ CRACK! ] This theory is every bit as worthless as the other one!

[Video]

[fish-and-coffee.livejournal.com]

Whoa, M-Ma'am, please calm down! [Eep! A whip! She is... unintentionally hiding from the vine now] U-Um, you're in the Garden and I'm afraid the only explanation I can give you is the same as everyone else's.

The Queen of Hearts brought us here and I don't know why. B-But it's a really nice place!

[A pause. She peeks into the vine]

Would you like some tea? Perhaps to help calm your nerves? Being transported to an unknown place can be pretty crazy, I'm sure.

[Video]

[whipcracks.livejournal.com]

No, I would not like some tea! What I'd like is someone who can provide me with information that's actually useful, which you are obviously not! [ CRACK! ]

[peachhat.livejournal.com]

A whipping? How scary. Do you always threaten people who point out that you come across as a complete and utter fool? It's true, you know.

[whipcracks.livejournal.com]

I assure you, it's not simply a threat. [ CRACK! ] Give me your name.

[shanghaiworld.livejournal.com]

Fine. You were kidnapped. That's it, really.

[whipcracks.livejournal.com]

Into a garden out of which there is no way out, with one or two hundred other people and birds that serve teriyaki chicken. Forgive me if I don't find that three-word explanation to be anywhere near satisfactory.

[border-phantasm.livejournal.com]

And yet that's all you'll get. Pity, really.

[whipcracks.livejournal.com]

If you're just going to repeat what everyone else has said, you'd be better off sparing me your input.