existential 008 [video]

[no-hometown.livejournal.com]

[It is dusk, and the area behind Sephiroth is too dark to ascertain exactly where she is, but it is clear that she is alone, in a place where tall trees cast shadows. She seems thoughtful, but not overly emotional, perhaps even slightly detached, as she speaks.]

There is an idea that has been preoccupying me for some time. Once, I spoke to the Queen and one of her associates--or subordinates--and they said certain things to me that I have not been able to forget.

I was told that we have not truly been removed from our worlds, but that only a part of us has been taken, and while we are here, our other selves, our true selves, continue on in our daily lives.

It is possible that we are merely puppets, simulacra made for the Queen's use or entertainment, and not the people we believe ourselves to be. What if what was taken from us was a copy of our memories, which was then given to a false form? If so, when we leave this place, we will disappear. Our existence and our time here will have been meaningless. Those who have vanished and then return claim to have new memories from their own worlds, but what if they are nothing but new constructs with more stolen memories?

I know of no way to test this theory, but it troubles me. If that were the nature of our existence, I do not know if I would choose to exist.

Comments

video.

[moonlighters.livejournal.com]

[ If only existing were that simple. But somehow it did seem to match up with her situation, considering she never recalled taking a portal, or a mission, to this world. Though...if someone like Roxas was a Nobody without a heart, not meant to exist, what was there to take apart in the first place? ]

...Simulacra?

video

[no-hometown.livejournal.com]

[She turns toward the mirror when she hears a voice, having glanced away. The dim light makes her eyes seem to gleam more brightly.]

A copy. A false version.

Though it is only a theory.

video.

[moonlighters.livejournal.com]

But...that doesn't make any sense.

I'm pretty sure I'm me. No one else. Maybe I can't prove it, but these are my memories.

[ a beat. ]

If you did find out if you were a [ Nobody ] copy, would you really give up that quickly?

[video]

[mnementomori]

That...that can't be.

Because...I'm all there is left.

[video]

[no-hometown.livejournal.com]

Are you? [Her expression softens a fraction. She has sympathy for this young woman, more than she does for most people.] You might be right. There is no way to prove or disprove it, and perhaps I was lied to.

I did not intend to cause you distress. I wanted to know what others thought. I have been trying to decide what I would do if I were sure I was a copy.

[video]

[mnementomori]

[she hesitates, visibly even, in the form of a little flinch. But maybe this is the most important time to say such a thing.]

Copies aren't...they...they're not worthless. They have their own meaning.

[urbanwonderland.livejournal.com]

[Reeve's hair is wet, as if she's just showered, which she has. She appears thoughtful.]

No, I can't think of a way to test your theory, though I wish I could. Part of me almost wants what you say to be the case-- then at least I'd be less worried about the events taking place in my world. But yes, a part of me is very troubled by the idea as well.
Though I do say that even if I am a construct, I can't beleive that my existence here, all I've learned, is meaningless. Even if I were to vanish, I would still have "lived" this time in my own way. If that makes any sense at all.

But Sephiroth, as compelling as the idea is, I don't know that I'd trust any idea that the Queen or any of her associates put into my head. They seem to have a knack for targeting one's weak spots. So to speak.

[no-hometown.livejournal.com]

[She closes her eyes for a moment.] I know I am already a construct in some ways. That is, things were done to me, and I do not know what they were. I was made the way I am. [Her upbringing and her uniqueness make that clear, though many things have been kept from her.]

[After a pause, she opens her eyes again.] What would render it meaningless would be the fact that all of us would be constructs. This would all be for someone else's benefit, not for our own, our interactions meant to serve as energy or entertainment. We would have no true autonomy.

I do not trust them. They did not say these things to me, though my theorizing is based on their words. It is possible.

[urbanwonderland.livejournal.com]

Yes, that's precisely what I mean. I'm not sure that theories based on cryptic statements made by our abductors are liable to be among the most sound theories you could develop.

But, for the sake of argument, I will say that I feel intent in creation isn't all. I know that you're a construct in some respects, but that hasn't stripped you of humanity, or of free will. I don't beleive that any human contact, even if one is a human construct, is meaningless. In the end, we make meaning-- or the lack of it.

Possibly I'm simply very stubborn, but I do think it is still possible to act in good faith even in a faithless situation.

[video]

[restlessdevil.livejournal.com]

You mean, there could be another me, still trapped in my own world? Geez, poor her. I wouldn't want to be in her shoes.

...Though I guess this means my fear of disappearing is just as valid. Either I return to the mirror, or if this theory is right, I die... This is a lot to think about.

[video]

[no-hometown.livejournal.com]

It is possible that the original version of you remains trapped. I myself am pleased by the idea that I remain in my world, as I am important to the war effort, and I would not want to suddenly disappear from the battlefield.

However, I don't enjoy the idea that I was created to exist here simply for the Queen's benefit. That she may have created us simply to allow us disappear at her will or caprice is a troubling thought.

If only there were some way to break free.

[video]

[restlessdevil.livejournal.com]

Hmm... on the one hand, as long as we don't allow her to control us, I don't mind being here for her enjoyment, as voyeuristic as that sounds. Though I can't understand what enjoyment she gets watching us. [She guesses watching girls is fun, but hardly interacting with them? That makes no sense to Zenobia.]

On the other hand, if this means I'll disappear whenever the Queen tires of me or something, then... then things are very dire.

If you find a way to break free and need an ally, I'll be there if you call. Though I'm not strong or wise. But I don't want to go back. And I don't want to disappear.

[phobophage]

There's always been the possibility that I'm no more than a figment of the imagination of the Queen of Dreams, the most powerful Dream or maybe Dreamer in existence. It's a certainty that if she stopped existing, I'd as well. What you say isn't anything new to me.

It doesn't matter. I'll exist on my terms. I'll create my own power to exist, by myself.

[no-hometown.livejournal.com]

We will all stop existing someday. Your nature and perhaps your reality is clearly very different from my own. I cannot speak to that.

But I too wish to exist on my terms. What I find most troubling about this place is the idea that our autonomy may have been taken from us. We have been removed from our proper roles, forced into this closed environment, for someone else's benefit. These are not my terms.

[phobophage]

I don't appreciate being anyone's plaything, either. Here or at home.

[notvitiligo.livejournal.com]

Not that I trust her to know what she's talking about, but... assuming that's an accurate statement of the situation...

I don't know if being copies necessarily means we're, uh, fakes. Could just be like software or something, where any complete copy's a real copy. We just would happen to be, y'know, different timeline. Or something like that.

I'm also not sure about the hypothesis that us leaving here would necessarily mean us disappearing. Why wouldn't we, say, just go back to our, um, original selves?

I guess I'm just saying, if your hypothesis is unproveable, and it messes with you... maybe it's a crappy hypothesis? I mean, in that it's got no real scientific or logical worth, and it makes you upset, so... yeah...

[no-hometown.livejournal.com]

I also don't trust her, but as I was given the information, I should consider it.

The copies may be the same. I don't necessarily mean to question the worth of all copies. What I question is the utilization of this copy, the intent with which it was made, and the existence I have been forced into.

I would prefer to be reunited with myself, but if we can be rejoined, then we are not complete copies, but something else. [She has a possibly even stronger dislike of the idea of being divided.]

I wish to know why we are here and what we are. How are we resurrected so easily? I will not shy away from any idea simply because it troubles me. No hypothesis is truly provable here, but that will not stop me from considering them.

[notvitiligo.livejournal.com]

Weren't you kind of forced into Shinra stuff? Or is that different?

Hmmm... I guess. I'm not really sure how it'd work with people copies. I'm inclined to just say, "Well, it's stupid magic" and leave it at that, here.

[She frowns slightly.] It just seems like the kind of thing where, if you can't really do anything with it, why does it matter? I guess it's just easier for me to try and think about concrete things and all, because I suck at philosophy. I dunno.

Sorry, I'm not really helping.

[bel-donna.livejournal.com]

Even if we were just copies formed from someone's memories, would it really matter?

[no-hometown.livejournal.com]

Why would it not matter? It brings into question why we have been made. If we are copies, we were created to serve someone else's interests in this false, closed environment, acting here for them. We are not free.

Do you think it is acceptable to create copies of someone without their consent? You would not mind multiple copies of yourself being created?

[bel-donna.livejournal.com]

No, I would never agree to such a thing, using people for your own amusement is never right.

But, the situation remains, whether we are copies or not, we were brought here against our free will and forced to play along with the queen's little game.

video

[latomatetas.livejournal.com]

...It sounds plausible.

If it helps, my dau- Romana, one of my dearest, told me that she saw me back in our world as if I wasn't here at all. She said I lived as if I wasn't here at all.

[ soft sigh ] I don't suppose that's much help, though. Lo siento ().

video

[no-hometown.livejournal.com]

I thank you. That information might not precisely help, but it does seem to prove that the people of our worlds are not aware of our absences.

In some ways, that is reassuring, as I would not want to think that my men were made to do without me. My absence would doubtlessly have an adverse effect on the war effort.

Though that does not resolve the question of what, exactly, is the nature of this place and the versions of us that are here.

[welljustwatchme.livejournal.com]

While I think you might be on to something, I also think that if we start thinking like that, that we're only copies that will never really get out of here, we'll all just go crazy faster.

[no-hometown.livejournal.com]

I don't believe the fact that an idea is unpleasant means that one should avoid thinking about it, especially if there is a possibility that it could be true.

While it does make me uneasy, I would not act on it, as it cannot currently be proven.