3rd Course - Necessary Ingredients [Video]

[starofpleiades]

[Kazumi's expression is worried; not surprising after how the last few weeks have been. She wasn't really affected much, but she saw people who were...]

Is everyone alright now? Back to normal...?

[She sighs, looking a bit forlorn.]

Things making people act unlike themselves... what's "like yourself" though, other than how you acted before? I mean... what makes up a person? Our bodies? Our actions? Our memories?

[Memories...]

...hey, what do memories mean to you? How important are your memories? If you had something painful in your past... do you think it'd be better not to remember it?

[She's taking the video just outside the apartment complex, so anyone is free to run into her there or respond over the vine]

Comments

[notvitiligo]

Probably not. It's a bunch of different stuff all put together. It's like... if you have two diseases- I mean, not that you have them, but like they exist...

[ahem]

There's two diseases, and they both make your nose run, they're similar in that symptom, but they have a bunch of other stuff that makes them separate.

It's like that with people.

[starofpleiades]

Well... I'd say they're different then!

[notvitiligo]

Well, yeah, but my point is that you can't just judge on one action. You gotta take the whole suite of behavior.

[starofpleiades]

I guess so. But I mean, sometimes people change some parts and still do other things they used to. At what point are they the same person or a different one?

[notvitiligo]

I think it's always the same person, really. Though I admit it's a really fuzzy definition. Like, if someone gets brain damage and their behavior changes dramatically overnight, I don't know if they're the same person or not.

I guess there's a lot of different stuff that goes into "person."

[starofpleiades]

Yeah, what if they like... get amnesia? But later get some of their memories back?

A lot of different stuff, huh...

[notvitiligo]

Well, the thing with amnesia is, it's not really that you don't have the memories anymore, you just can't use them. So a person with it would still behave the same, they just wouldn't know why.

People are pretty complicated. Even leaving aside everything that isn't the brain.

[starofpleiades]

Hmm, would they? I don't really know how those things work... I guess that makes sense though. I still knew how to cook after all!

[notvitiligo]

Oh, this has to do with you?

[starofpleiades]

Um, sort of! I mean, the amnesia does. But I wonder in everyone's case, what memories mean to them...

[notvitiligo]

What they mean to us, huh?

I'm... not really sure. I mean, I guess it's like... being able to understand reality and the past. If you're missing memories... you don't really have all of the picture.

Well, except you don't have it all even if you have memories, since the brain is kind of a crappy recorder, but you don't even have a hint if there's no memory.

[starofpleiades]

So, it's good to have them so you can know things... but what about bad memories? Painful ones... would it be better to forget them?

[notvitiligo]

[Instantly:] No way! There's no bad memory, just ones you don't like. They're all important. You can't make any sort of informed decision if you only listen to things you like.

[starofpleiades]

No such thing as bad memories... I didn't really think of it that way.

So, you think knowing is better, even if its painful or unpleasant?

[notvitiligo]

Of course. That's how you can understand what's going on around you.

[starofpleiades]

Hmm... yeah, I think it's better to know the truth.

[notvitiligo]

Otherwise, you're up for grabs.

[starofpleiades]

So have you had any problems with memories?

[notvitiligo]

Yeah. Not like amnesia or anything, just...

[She fidgets uncomfortably, avoiding looking at the mirror as she tries to put together an explanation.]

When I was little, they thought I had some kind of, um... y'know, mental thing. Like schizophrenia. I don't, of course, but...

[She takes in Kazumi's expression carefully before continuing.]

They put me on some meds. Antipsychotics, usual stuff. But since my problem wasn't really mental, it didn't do anything but turn me into a zombie. So... there's a while in my childhood where I don't really have much other than a blur.

[starofpleiades]

Oh no... I'm sorry to hear that. But they got it sorted out eventually?

[notvitiligo]

Well, they took me off the meds.

[Not so much anything else.]

[starofpleiades]

At least that's something. Did they ever figure out what was wrong? Or if anything was wrong?

[notvitiligo]

[She shakes her head.] Ruled out just about everything, but nobody has any real idea what's up. I'm the only recorded case.

[starofpleiades]

Huh... so what is it? I mean, the symptoms that made them think something was wrong?

[notvitiligo]

It's... kind of complicated.

The shorthand version is that I... sort of, um, interact with stuff that nobody else can. Involuntarily.