nine | video | (batgirl)

[gravityfists.livejournal.com]

[ a vigilante wakes up in an alternate universe, suits up, and is promptly attacked by the Vine. Batgirl's barely tugged her cowl back on when the mirror leaps out at her, and for the first few seconds, the transmission consists mostly of spandex-clad hands wrestling with it, trying to turn it skywards ] Goddammit, don't you know that I'm only supposed to come out at night? What part of Dark Knight don’t you get? [ frustrated, she hits the front of the mirror. It doesn’t seem to mind, and just backs off, getting a full shot of her. Batgirl takes a deep breath, pinching the bridge of her nose. Talking to plants is never a good way to start your day ]

… it's sentient. Don't try telling me the Vine doesn’t understand puns.

[ she straightens up, putting on her Serious Face ]

If this is another girls-only alternate universe, you guys are gonna have one pissed Bat on your hands. I'm not even kidding. I was just given a shiny new secret hideout full of futuristic gadgets that put the iPhone 4 to shame, a new car, a sidekick-slash-stalker, and I invented Magnaelectrogooparangs. I had Reapers to reap! I was going places! And now? Now this.

I need a roll call, the 411, and something shockingly unhealthy to eat.

Comments

[gravityfists.livejournal.com]

Did you tell 'em about the dog and the hat and the thimble? That's gonna cause major confusion no matter what 'verse people are from.

[notvitiligo.livejournal.com]

I mentioned the hat, but they were more like the, uh, rose, the lips, the chocolate box...

Have I mentioned that I hate this place, by the way? Totally ruins Monopoly when it's all pink.

[gravityfists.livejournal.com]

Jeez. The Queen managed to ruin Monopoly? What else has been going on? Did she replace all the Scrabble tiles with candy hearts?

[notvitiligo.livejournal.com]

Haven't tried that one.

Though... edible Scrabble sounds fun. You could make like cute little cookies and all... Or maybe checkers... [And now, she has An Idea.]

[gravityfists.livejournal.com]

Well, I'm glad to know that all of my conversations eventually derail into food-territory. You don't need a pretence of a game, by the way. To eat cookies. Just go for it.

[notvitiligo.livejournal.com]

Yeah, but you can't deny it's a cute idea.

And besides, if I'm just going to be stuck here forever, I may as well turn into some kind of nerd homemaker. I mean, since I'm not really "defend against the invading hordes" material.

[gravityfists.livejournal.com]

How's that going, by the way? I hear we had ghosts.

[notvitiligo.livejournal.com]

I have no idea. Deimonea said it's some kind of... illusion thing, and something about psychological warfare. They're apparently out at the egdes, and I'm keeping hunkered down in the fortress like a good little sitting duck, so yeah.

[gravityfists.livejournal.com]

I had something like that happen to me before. The short version: an oversized Scarecrow drugged me. The solution: reaching deep inside yourself to find the strength to overcome your ghosts.

Clichéd as hell. But it works!

[notvitiligo.livejournal.com]

An oversized Scarecrow drugged you.

Your world is weird.

I doubt they're actual ghosts. I don't think there are any here at all. None that I've seen, at least.

[gravityfists.livejournal.com]

Nah, I didn't get actual ghosts, either. Not unless my past-self and ex-boyfriend have recently gone six feet under, and I sure as hell don't remember that happening.

My life. It's an extended metaphor.

[notvitiligo.livejournal.com]

I guess you could argue something about your past self being dead because of growth and stuff, but metaphors are annoying, so.

[gravityfists.livejournal.com]

That's pretty much a waste of everyone's time. Even I try not to think about things that deeply.

[notvitiligo.livejournal.com]

And yet, people are paid to do it. Me, I prefer things that make some sort of logical sense. But I guess that's a handicap in this place...

[gravityfists.livejournal.com]

I dunno. It seems like you're still in one piece, at least.

[notvitiligo.livejournal.com]

Seems, though there's all sorts of fun possibilities that that could be totally off.

Y'know, it'd just be nice to be somewhere where I could draw a map and have it stay accurate for more than a day or so.

[gravityfists.livejournal.com]

Huh. What's the latest feature?

[notvitiligo.livejournal.com]

I was thinking more the little things, like the fact that one day you pass a big rose bush on the right, and then the next day, same path, the bush is on your left.

Or am I the only one that noticed that?

[gravityfists.livejournal.com]

Important question: did you walk through a mirror at any point in your day?

[notvitiligo.livejournal.com]

[Snort] Uh, no, I'm pretty sure that's 1) not actually possible for most people, and 2) something I'd have noticed.

Besides, wouldn't the whole place be a chess metaphor if that were the case?

[gravityfists.livejournal.com]

I dunno. Is chess gay enough? Can we make a gay metaphor outta chess?

[notvitiligo.livejournal.com]

I know people who can make a gay metaphor out of anything. Probably including heterosexual intercourse.

[gravityfists.livejournal.com]

Well, if the Queen hasn't already, I'm sure she's gonna recruit 'em now.

[notvitiligo.livejournal.com]

Well, it's usually the guy kind, but knowing the "girls only" magic here...

Man, that would be too creepy.