queenofheartsrp | five

Okay. The Queen's latest mess has been cleaned up. Nobody's dead. Some of us have medals. [ Not that Batgirl got a medal, despite nearly being eaten by half a dozen vampire plants. Vampants? Planpires? Lame. This is why they should've been Frankenplants. ] That's fantastic. Seriously, thanks to everyone who helped out through healing, fighting, and defence strategies. It's great to know that if we never need to stage an emergency barbecue, apparently, we have the fire power to pull it off.

Of course, now that we're in the calm-after-the-last-storm-but-before-the-next-one-that's-gonna-suck-even-more, there's not much to do but sit and reflect. Y'know, on how we're trapped in another world, and everyone back home either thinks we're dead or missing or worse. I mean, me being here just proves everyone right about me – that I can't see anything through, blah blah, failure – and I've even let Babs down.

Not that I'm looking for free therapy or anything. I just want everyone to know that I hate the downtime as much as the almost-eaten-by-Eldritch-horrors time.

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Sounds fun.

It sounds like there's the basis for a sitcom in there somewhere, but I'm not completely sure the brain-eating would get past the censors.

That's high class comedy right there, don't be ridiculous.

I guess we could always put some red food dye in cauliflowers and get the crew to chew on those.

Excellent problem solving skills, we ought to elect you Garden Mayor.

Huh.

You know, if we ever have an election, I'm totally running.

'And chocolate eclairs for all those songbirds and bunnies!'

She'd get my vote.

Wait, wait.

Can rabbits eat chocolate? It's not like how chocolate poisons dogs, right? 'cause that probably wouldn't be the best platform to stand on.

Oh yeah, that's right, cocoa poisoning... I'll take the bunnies' share, nepotism's the best way to go, right?

Hey, it's got my approval.

Glad we got this plan sealed up real tight then.

Yup.

Good to see that we're only dealing with the really important things.

Serious business, sweetheart.

Wanna make a bet about what's gonna go down next?

First day of Spring is less than a month away.

You think we're gonna be attacked by demonic Easter bunnies?

Might be. Or start laying eggs, or get infested with lovebirds.

In my own world, my whole order has to celebrate the season the way Spring Reposing Within sees fit.

Come again?

He's one of the fo-- five seasons, one of our bigwig gods, more powerful than Yggdrasil, less powerful than their father, that'd be Time, by the way. We hold welcoming ceremonies for all of 'em, but Spring's a little pushier than the others.

Huh. I see.

But if he's a he, then we shouldn't have to worry about that, right?

He's... not really got a gender. I mean, we call him a he, and he's got two sisters, but that's mostly to make it easier than calling them 'it'.

I guess we'll find out.

Great. Anything I should stock up on?

Eeeh, not exactly. All he wants is a big orgy, nothin' too complicated.

Uuugh. Ohmygod, the Queen's going to want the same thing, isn't she?

I wouldn't... exactly put it past her. Then again, lesbian orgy sounds about as probable as an Easter bunny attack, and that's just a sad set of odds to be lining up.

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