[dream]

[notvitiligo.livejournal.com]

[warning for light torture elements]
[She's Cinderella, running down polished glass hallways. (She is also, at the same time, a rat.) A labyrinth, with walls stretching above her head, too thick to shatter. There's a goal, a reward, a way out somewhere, if she can just find it.

[The center: sunflower seeds (huge to a human, normal-sized to a rat), colored green and silver. She reaches for the reward.]

ZAP

[The shock is painful and from nowhere (or a hand on the dial in Milgram's experiment). She backs away, turns to try the maze again.]

ZAP

[She freezes, waiting for the pain to fade.]

ZAP

[It continues no matter what, and there's nothing to do. And now the maze is clear (her perspective is overhead, even as she's stuck below) and there is no exit, no reward, only endless glass walls, teasing offers of treats, and now the shocks.]

ZAP ZAP ZAP ZAP

[She sags, sliding down the wall and pulling her knees to her chest, and tries to restrain the twitching of her muscles against the torture.]

Comments

[notvitiligo.livejournal.com]

Hard to say... I'm the only one back home who's really seen them. Well, other than some really showy ones. I'd... really rather not mess around in something that's this murky, ethically speaking. I mean, what if they're just... sort of differently conscious?

Yeah, if they were both. Haven't really seen it a lot, though. I think the only really coherent conversations I ever had were a guy that really wanted me off his land, and this girl that didn't get why she was dead.

I mean, I guess there's something to be said for the "natural" state of things, but... y'know, as long as a person's still, y'know... who they are. You could put my brain in a... robot body or something and I'd still be me, right?

Hah, I'm getting into philosophy territory now. I hate philosophy.

[no-hometown.livejournal.com]

Then we should progress. If one of them attacks us, I will attack in return, and it will be self-defense. [There's no gray area there in Sephiroth's mind.]

That is my point. They would be interesting to talk to if they were both logical and coherent. Since they are not, they are not as useful for research as they could be.

I agree. If your consciousness is intact, you're still you. [She ponders.] What if your mind changed, but your body was the same? [A pause.] Philosophy can be interesting, but it depends.

[notvitiligo.livejournal.com]

And what if it turns out you can't do anything to them? [Still leery. VERY leery. She eyes the house. It's unsettling, a tune she can hum but can't place.]

I don't know... maybe it depends on the change in your mind. I hear it's hard for people who know Alzheimer's patients because they stop being themselves. And people say you're a different person when you're treated for mental illness... [She looks around thoughtfully.]

I wonder if there's a road we can get to...

[no-hometown.livejournal.com]

[In spite of her very real misgivings about the house, now Sephiroth is growing curious. She likes to know things.] I could go and look while you wait here. [She's still confident that she can handle herself, though wary.] Then I can report back.

[She nods, seriously.] I think it is the mind that matters. If that were to change enough, you'd become a different person, but your body could change completely and you'd still be yourself.

I don't see a road.

[notvitiligo.livejournal.com]

NO. [And she grabs Sephiroth's shoulder before even thinking about it.]

[no-hometown.livejournal.com]

[Sephiroth doesn't mind the touch in the least, but she gazes up at Jessica, curiously.]

If you're sure I shouldn't... [In spite of a natural stubborn independence, she is also conditioned to follow orders.] I know nothing would happen to me. [It never does; she is the strongest!]

Why does it alarm you? [She still wants to know why Jessica said "home" before and then couldn't remember.]

[notvitiligo.livejournal.com]

Sorry...

I... really don't know. Just... [she shakes her head]

I know it's irrational, but... It just feels... bad.

[no-hometown.livejournal.com]

[After a hesitation, because she hates to leave a mystery unsolved, Sephiroth nods.]

Then where should we go next? You said there might be a road?

[notvitiligo.livejournal.com]

Yeah...

[As she looks around for power lines, everything fades white. The dream ends.]