[text]

[notvitiligo.livejournal.com]

[Oh look it's another of those anonymous texts on the vine.]

Question:
Assume a situation where you need to practice something.
You have a friend that has offered to help you.
This friend would be an excellent help.
But the practice would involve being more open with close to exposed than you are comfortable with.
What would you do?

Comments

[urbanwonderland.livejournal.com]

I'm sure that a friend who offered to help you with something so sensitive would be respectful of your feelings. Have you been open with your friend about your discomfort?

[notvitiligo.livejournal.com]

I have done that. I do not really think she would be a problem. It is a personal thing.

[urbanwonderland.livejournal.com]

I see! Is part of the problem perhaps that you want to be exposed, to feel the closeness that comes from sharing that kind of experience? Taking that kind of risk is quite frightening, I know.

[notvitiligo.livejournal.com]

[A long pause]

I guess that is it. And because I am kind of sure the other person does not really feel that way. It is really stupid.

[urbanwonderland.livejournal.com]

You're being a bit hard on yourself, honestly. Even if you were absolutely sure the other person didn't return your feelings, your own feelings wouldn't be "stupid". In your place, I'd carry on as if the person in question were my very good friend. If friendship is what's offered to you, make the very most you can of it. Let her do this thing for you, whatever it is, sharing trust might bring you closer. Even if it's not in the way you'd think of as ideal.

[notvitiligo.livejournal.com]

I am not really sure it is friendship either. It is weird. I think of her as my friend though.

But that does sound like pretty good advice. I will have to try to get un-nervous enough to do it I guess.

[urbanwonderland.livejournal.com]

I think I understand. Not to sound totally banal, but these things are complicated-- it's only natural to be nervous. I'm glad my advice was helpful!

[notvitiligo.livejournal.com]

My life is pretty complicated but not usually in this way. Thank you.